Since childhood, many of us have played the game "Monopoly," where we start under equal conditions, take turns, roll the dice, buy or sell property, make deals, plan, and take risks. Victory or bankruptcy often seems just one step away. However, not everything depends on a well-thought-out strategy—sometimes unexpected cards can forever change the course of the game.
Parents of children with disabilities often receive unexpected turns in the form of a card that reads, "Your child has special needs. Skip three turns." It might seem that the game is lost even before it begins. But what if this card is not a verdict but an invitation to rethink the rules of the game?
Let’s talk about the real-life "Monopoly," where the stakes are much higher than paper money, and explore how mothers of children with disabilities not only stay in the game but rewrite the rules, turning challenges into opportunities for personal and professional growth. This is not about limitations, as many might think, but about expanding one’s horizons. It’s about how unexpected twists of fate can become a catalyst for unlocking hidden potential and achieving new career heights and personal fulfillment.
"The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure." This powerful quote belongs to Sven-Göran Eriksson, a renowned Swedish football coach. While it has a general meaning, it is especially relevant to the self-esteem and career ambitions of mothers of children with special needs. Their fear of failure is often linked to low self-esteem and doubts about their ability to balance a career with caregiving. Overcoming this fear can be a key step toward realizing career ambitions. Understanding that failure is part of the growth process can help boost self-esteem and foster more courageous goal-setting. The key is to keep moving forward and continuously work on oneself to achieve external success.
According to the World Health Organization, about 15% of the world’s population (over 1 billion people) lives with some form of disability. This means that millions of mothers face unique challenges every day, balancing caregiving and their career ambitions. Statistics show that only 55% of mothers of children with disabilities work full-time, compared to 74% of mothers of children without disabilities. This disparity reflects not only objective difficulties but also an internal struggle with self-esteem and reevaluation of their aspirations. However, despite these challenges, research also shows that 78% of mothers of children with disabilities say that their caregiving experience has made them stronger, more empathetic, and more creative in solving work-related issues and problems. These extraordinary women find their unique path to professional fulfillment while nurturing and supporting their children. They transform their mirror of self-esteem into a source of strength, and the window of career ambitions into a portal to new opportunities.
Self-esteem can be defined simply as how a person values themselves. It’s our internal perception of our worth, abilities, and qualities.
- It’s your opinion of yourself: how you view yourself, and what you think about your strengths and weaknesses.
- Inner voice: what you tell yourself about yourself in your thoughts.
- Sense of self-worth: how valuable and important you consider yourself to be.
- Confidence in yourself: how much you believe in your abilities and potential.
- Self-perception: how you treat yourself—with respect or disdain.
Self-esteem can be high, low, or balanced, and it can change over time depending on the situation. It influences behavior and often determines how you act in various situations and interact with others.
Essentially, self-esteem is your personal "I believe I am..." It affects your decisions, relationships, and overall sense of happiness and life satisfaction.
Career ambitions refer to your aspirations and goals concerning professional development and success in your chosen field. Simply put, it’s what you want to achieve in your job or profession. Here are some key aspects of career ambitions:
- Professional goals: specific achievements you aim for in your career.
- Desire for growth: striving to learn new things and improve in your work.
- Ambition for success: seeking recognition, status, or a certain level of accomplishment.
- Motivation: the internal drive that pushes you forward in your career.
- Long-term vision: imagining where and what you want to be in a few years professionally.
- Readiness for challenges: willingness to take on difficult tasks to achieve your goals.
- Financial expectations: aiming for a certain level of income or financial stability.
- Work-life balance: your vision of the ideal balance between your career and personal life.
- Impact: desire to make a meaningful contribution to your field or society through your work.
- Personal brand: aspiration to build a certain reputation or image in your professional environment.
Career ambitions are unique to each person and can change over time, depending on life circumstances, experience, and personal priorities. Motherhood is a challenging task in itself, but raising a child with special needs introduces additional challenges that can significantly impact a woman’s self-esteem and career ambitions.
Feelings of guilt and helplessness, social isolation, constant stress, emotional exhaustion, financial difficulties, and pressure or misunderstanding from those closest—these can all severely impact self-esteem, distorting and lowering it. Limited time for professional development, the need for flexible working hours, shifting priorities, and the fear of discrimination at work can hamper career ambitions, provoke insecurity, and hold back progress.
How can a mother of a child with disabilities develop confidence in herself? First, psychological support and consultations with specialists are essential, as well as participation in support groups for parents of children with disabilities, developing new skills and interests, finding balance between caring for the child and personal life, and adhering to guidance.
Here are a few recommendations for developing self-confidence:
1. Practice self-compassion:
- Acknowledge the difficulty of your situation.
- Be kind to yourself during tough times.
- Remember that you are doing your best, and sometimes even the impossible.
- Accept your imperfections.
- Understand that mistakes are part of life and learning.
- Let go of the pursuit of perfection in everything.
2. Set realistic goals:
- Break big tasks into smaller, achievable steps.
- Celebrate each success, no matter how small.
- Regularly review and adjust your goals.
3. Build your support network:
- Connect with other parents in similar situations.
- Join online communities or local support groups.
- Don’t hesitate to ask for help from friends and family.
- Surround yourself with people who inspire you.
4. Invest in personal development:
- Make time to learn new skills.
- Attend courses or webinars related to your interests, professional development, or your child’s needs.
- Help others; it increases your sense of value.
5. Take care of your physical health:
- Exercise regularly, as physical achievements boost overall confidence.
- Follow a healthy diet.
- Ensure you get enough sleep and rest.
6. Practice stress management techniques:
- Learn relaxation methods such as meditation or deep breathing.
- Keep a journal to express your thoughts and emotions.
- Set aside time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation.
By applying these recommendations and continuously working on oneself, mothers of children with disabilities can significantly boost their self-esteem and achieve their career ambitions while ensuring the best care for their children.
Publication prepared with the financial support of the German Marshall Fund of the United States. Its content is the sole responsibility of the NGO "Epilepsy Awareness" and does not necessarily reflect the views of the German Marshall Fund.
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